17th Aug, 09 : The Birthday "Bakra" & "Baratis"

Main programs by/for the birthday "baraat": 

Waiting("baraat" waiting) -> Planning("baraat" planning) -> Spamming("baraat" spams) -> Scaring(("bhai log" scaring me) -> Pulling -> Pinching -> Washing(at Lakes)  -> Patting (beating) -> Rolling (in sand) -> Smashing (the cake) -> Dancing(Choli ke peeche) ->Singing(dhak dhak) -> Drinking(RC) -> Fighting (not known) -> Thanking(to u all:)

Count: 100+ Baraatis
Food: 1 Bakra

7th August, 2009 - Today is my birthday. Never thought that the day will be such a memorable day. Great Lakers already planned for almost “Ending” me on my Birth.

Reason: I have not spared even a single person from the merciless birthday bumps and didn't leave even a single opportunity of smashing the cake/ice-cream. I just love to do all that even after trying to stop myself. But “butt”, could not help ;). So everybody was waiting from a long time to kick my ass. People already started spamming and planning how to butcher me. I was pretty perplexed with the whole situation. :D

Few Preparation by me: While I didn't tell anyone but here are the few preparations done by me. From 9:00 PM, I started mailing personally to few people to support me. Also visited few “bhai log” to meet personally and to keep them less aggressive at least. After taking few consolations from “bhai log”, I started padding work at 11:00 PM. The padding included 1+1+1 under wear, then a cushy towel, then my swimming costume, then my rugged short-pant, then hankies in the back pockets. All this to save my sweet ASS…;)

All guys started collecting near to my room by 11:30 PM itself. Few were waiting to start slaughter game and others wanted not to lose the fun. Whatever it is most importantly I am the GOAT here. It was as if before Dusshera Ravan’s effigy fire, children become too excited about the fire-game.

Correct at 12, people pull me out of the room and started beating, pulling and what and what not. 

(Pinching: Left to right: Sushil "Burnol", Varun "Bday Bakra", Mitesh, Manjit "Daarji", Gaurav, Angad "Chota Muthu")

Soon there was a full “baraat” to have fun of the slaughter.  I think there were around 100 Great Lakers. I tightened my Ass as anybody out of 100 would have screwed them up anytime.

The “baraat” then dragged me towards the pavements. Now few of the “bhai log” wanted to kick me, so they tried to take me towards the basket ball court. But there was another “bhai-log” gang who wanted to take me for a bath in the dirty lakes of Great Lakes.  Yukkkk…whatever was the final decision I was the BAKRA. Finally the latter gang won and I have been dragged towards the “great” lakes. Hitesh, Aravind, and Mohit were busy in taking picture of the BAKRA and the “baraatis” while Charu was taking full fledged LIVE video of the grand BAKRA event.

Santosh, Sushil and Akhil were highly excited to throw me into lakes as soon as possible. Finally, CHAPPAAK,  I was immersed in water. I made a history here. The first person to take a bath in lakes of Great Lakes...;) Then CHAPPAAAAK, Sushil was also in the water. People pushed him. Bechara!!!     

(Creating History: The first person to take bath in the lake of Great Lakes)

As soon as I came out of the lake. Everybody started hitting wherever possible. Well the padding was also of no use after getting soaked in water. Moreover I didn't do any padding for my back :P.

Then “baraatis” took me to our sand volley-ball court. I have been asked to lay down on sand. As a slave I followed “bhai log” instructions as it was their day. I could not utter any word against any one as I made and will make ball for rest of the 364 days. As soon as I lay down, people started rolling me on sand. Damn…it was sand everywhere and it pricks too.  

(Sand rolling)

Vignesh was already ready with the cake just after the sand rolling. He was holding the cake in hands. I understood his wild intentions. The cake is not for consumption but it’s only for a Smash on my face. So as soon as I put the knife into the cake, the whole cake was “licking” my face.

(Pic: Super Smash Cake presented by Vignesh)

My eyes holes were all full of cake and unable to open eyes as if somebody put the fevi-kwik between eye-lids, people were singing happy birthday. Then asked few people to remove the cake from eyes. Meanwhile few people took advantage and kicked a few. Right timing…the guys are still safe even now due to temporary sight loss. Wished I should have kept few “khabris” in the “baraat”. 

 (Smashhhhhh!!! will not leave u Vignesh...wait for ur next bday)


After "licking", I mean removing cake, danced had a couple dance with Mukul after making him equally dirty by hugging. 

(Pic: Dance with Mukul, Left to right: Anuj, Varun "Bday Bakra", Mukul, Santosh, Himanshu "HeManShoo"

Then “barattis” took me at Great Lakes Piazza for next ”bakra” round. Manjit was asking all kind of questions which he generally asks from everyone. I tried to avoid it as it meant inviting bigger troubles. He he…

“Baraatis” as well as “Badmassh launde” wanted to be delighted by some show. I have been asked me to dance on “Choli ke peeche kya hai”, so they sang and I did a SEXY dance on “Choli ke peeche kya hai”. After that “baratis” asked me to sing something hot. Not to disappoint them I stated singing Madhuri’s “Dhak-dhak karne laga” and kept giving Madhuri’s dancing steps just to keep all guys laughing and happy.

 (Guys after Cake Smashing event, Left to right: Kumaravel, Ankur, Gaurav, Santosh, Vignesh(back), Akhil, Sushil "Burnol", Manjit "sardarji", chauhan and jay)

People were very happy with the overall event happened after 12. Vignesh specially congratulated me for such an eventful night. No other birthday has been so successfully “launched” till now. 

(Ending the Ceremony, Left to right: Kumaravel, Gaurav, Anuj, Aravind(front), Varun "Bday Bakra", Mukul, Himanshu "HeManShoo", Ayush "Body waale baba", Mitesh and Manjit) 


No party without drinks. The arrangement was all done already in advance with the help of M, V, H etc. Few dignitaries from “Baraat” were invited to enjoy the Daroo party. We drank like pigs, danced like peacock, sang like nightingale, played like Sachin and later fought like Bulls. Yes, few “launde” including me lost balance after daroo and had a big fight on some issue which I didn't know but just fought. LOL

So that’s how my 2Xth birthday has been celebrated. Hope to see more birthday celebrations coming and adding unforgettable and cherishable moments to our life at Great Lakes. Thanks to “Baraaati”, “Bhai Log” and “Badmas Launde” and all Great Lakers to make it such a memorable and grand moment.

PS: Thanks a lot to Hitesh, Mohit, Aravind for pics and Charu for taking the videos.

Group Cohesion and Development

 (Picture taken by Supriya. SK16)

Recently, I saw an English movie – Miracle (as asked by Prof before session). The movie is a real story about young, restless and individualist hockey players transformed into a great US hockey team, who later won the 1980 Winter Olympics. The movie is about building THE team, raising the team spirit to higher levels, sense of belonging. The most important message it conveys is about group cohesion which increases the performance of the team significantly.

What is cohesion in the group? It’s the feeling of attraction, connection, positivity towards the p for the reason of friendship or due to the pride one feels on joining the group. Many groups use the “hazing”, in forms of sacrifices or doing something extraordinary to before joining the group. It increases the cohesion of the members between each other as well as towards the group as a whole. Organization and institutions follow a difficult procedure to select the right candidates. It’s just a modern ways of hazing, so as to get right people in the group. Also, organizations spend lot of moolahs just to create a great cohesion between team members.

I still remember the great cohesion developed between members during Sarkundi Expedition, one of my very difficult Himalayan Expedition. Our group name was Sarkundi-16. Within 10 days the members developed a great cohesion for each other as well as for the SK-16 as a whole. We passed all difficulties with a great co-ordination, shared the food, water and basic necessities with each other. The great cohesion of SK-16 became as the benchmark for all other groups later.

 (The Sarkundi Expedition - SK16 group)

(SK-16 group at the base camp after completing the expedition safely. Even on having people of extreme demographics, the group developed a high cohesion and friendship in just 10 days. Probably the difficult goal put us together. Most of us are still in touch with each other. Miss you SK-16.)

But I was surprised with a study being done upon the relationship between group cohesion and performance. It was found out that performance of the group have higher impact on cohesion than vice-versa. Hence,

Performance à Cohesion == Higher Impact

Cohesion à Performance == Comparatively Lower

It nullifies many assumptions that cohesion may lead to better performance. Instead, the focus upon increasing better performance may lead to greater cohesion between team. However, most of the organizations focus upon increasing team cohesion, probably because it is objectively achievable or it’s the HR’s bread-butter. :-O

Another interesting study was the importance of group norms. Norms are major deciding factors of a team to accelerate or retard its performance. Let’s say the people in the group made the point of working less or being unproductive then on having a higher cohesion the group’s performance will significantly decrease. Hence, keeping right norms for the group is highly essential to get a high performance team. The role of the leader here is highly significant as he needs to set productive norms for the team while keeping the team cohesive.

Group Development happen in stages like Forming (members become familiar), Storming (tensions among members for status), Norming (establishments of rules, roles, structure, relations etc), Performing (achieving goals) and finally Adjourning (termination and completion of tasks). Also, each group members passes through various quantum of commitment towards the group which happens during entry, acceptance, divergence and exit from the group.

Leadership

A leader needs to know the importance the cohesiveness in the group and how to leverage it. He should also know about the group development and group life-cycle to articulate his decision and actions accordingly. Leadership is important to get high performance team by increasing cohesiveness of the group and keeping productive norms in place.

Individualism v/s Collectivism

Why do people join group? Human being is social animal. The answer lies behind the human being mind set to discover oneself, to be a part of something and to go beyond what he is. People lived life in solitude have either possessed super natural powers or they experienced the harmful affects like madness, illusions, memory loss.
The group behavior could be categorized in two worldviews: Individualism and Collectivism. All the people you find around could belong one of these categories or they may show one of the above characteristics at a particular situation. Individualistic could be termed as “I” or “Me” while collectivism as “We”. Individualist or Idiosyncratic theory revolves round the benefit of oneself before the group while the Collectivist theory put the group’s goal on priority.

World of Individuals
Everyone in this world in unique and in my opinion, whole world is just full of individualist. But if it so, then why a person sacrifice his interest for a group or society. Why shouldn’t he always do what he wants to do? Well, the answer lies behind the benefit the individual reaps by putting himself into social/group norms. Hence, it’s a trade-off between individualist and collectivist.  An example of it is that many people do not want to marry, or spouse does not want to conceive a child but just to conform to the society principles, these individualists do these against their will and in the result they reap benefit of affiliation, social status, power, and respect from society. Hence, unknowingly the individualist for their benefits shows collectivist behavior. This is how society works as Collectivist from Individualist. Coming to myself, even I believe I am an Individualist with Collectivist compromise with society. :P

Human Psychology
Most people prefer not to admit their faults, limitations. People readily embrace +ve feedback, but they question comments that are critical, they make mistakes they blame external factors but when they succeed they quickly claim credit.

One very important fact is about social comparison and social support. It has been found out that Misery Loves Company, Miserly Loves Miserable or More Miserable Company, Embarrassed Miserly Avoids Company. I could relate it with my real life examples: I met with an accident thrice, got fractures and hospitalized. The misery it brought me to lead me to keep searching for people like me with whom I may discuss, share my misery. It used to give an ultimate satisfaction. Even today if I find someone is some kindda same situations, I can easily empathize.

Leadership

As people have different minds, it’s important for a leader that he must understand the individualist and collectivist behaviors of people and act accordingly. As people do not like critics, leaders should always try to give positive feedback for improving people rather than criticizing them. Recognize their achievements and bring open and conducive environment so people even admit their mistakes.